3 Tips For Healing Past Relationship Wounds

Have you found yourself stuck in the past? Have you been reliving the hurt over and over again or

are you brought back to the wound or the pain by a trigger and although your greatest desire is to

leave that hurt in the past where it belongs, you seem stuck in it?

If that’s you, or maybe you know someone who needs your help to heal from past relationship

wounds, today I’m going to share with you 3 tips that you can start practicing to experience the

healing and transformation that you have been longing for.

My first tip is Let Go of the Hurt!

I know, that Letting go of past hurts and the memory of the wounds can be a difficult process and it

can be made even more difficult when you’ve been hurt by those you love or loved.

But it is time to Stop carrying it around- let go of it NOW!

Think about this:

Be careful the past wound hasn’t robbed you of your identity and your zeal for living.

Be careful, check your heart; check your life-has it robbed you of your joy? Did it take your peace?

Ensure that the wound and the memory surrounding it hasn’t forced you into a dark place where

you feel YOU don’t have to ever come out

Ensure that relationship wounds have not been telling you-that you deserved what you got

If that has been your experience, it is time to let go NOW

No need to cry over it any longer

You can choose to let it go-no matter how painful, no matter how long you have held on to it

No matter how long it has been influencing your emotions, the way you speak or how you live your life up to now.

No matter how long or how loudly it challenges your faith in God or man- you can choose to remove its power and let go of that wound today

It is an act of your will and then…you walk it out…daily

Choose to leave the wound/s in the past

Consider this:

You know you’ve truly let go when the wound no longer:

  • influences how you talk about yourself
  • influences how you truly see yourself
  • influences how you act (around men or)
  • influences your expectations about life and love
  • influences your attitude about your future
  • influences the way you live today
  • messes with your dreams
  • entertain the lie that gave the wound life

Every day is a good day to hear from God. LORD, speak to my heart Journal is perfect to use every day as you ask the LORD to speak to your heart about anything that concerns you. God wants to speak.

The second tip is to Give God the Pain…The Wound

So, you have finally let go of the wound…the pain, but you didn’t just let go of it into thin air- it isn’t floating searching for you because

As daughters of the Most High God you give those wounds, those hurts to Him. You place your

broken heart, your hurt feelings, your wounds in the nail scarred hands of Yeshua Amachiak- you

have placed them in the hands of Jesus.

I know you may be tempted to hold onto the hurt a little bit longer but let it go it’s time for a new

thing to start in your life. You may be familiar with Isaiah 43 a very popular scripture about

forgetting the past.

This scripture isn’t providing instructions and promises to the super spiritual- it contains instructions

and a promise for you and me

Let me remind you of what it says in verses 18-19 (CEV)

Do not call to mind the former things, Or ponder things of the past.

Behold, I will do something new, Now it will spring forth; Will you not be aware of it? I will even

make a roadway in the wilderness, Rivers in the desert.


Have you given the wounds to God?

I mean really-give them to God


are you like me?

Shouting and pouting and arguing with God over the hurt and dissecting every detail of the wrong

and I constantly had to face how I was feeling.

Have you been doing that?

Going over how you came to be wounded over and over again looking for insight and looking for answers?

or have you taken the issue to God and asked Him if anything you did played a part in you getting wounded?

It is never easy to come face to face with our imperfections but when we do under God’s watchful eyes we are better for it.

Be careful past wounds will lay the foundation for current hurts- so deal with them swiftly. Don’t get caught in a trap of it doesn’t matter-I’ll get over it.

No, honour how you feel. You matter to God and His only desire for you is that you live healed.

Know this, healthy new growth-new mindset for instance cannot spring up in old unhealed wounds- the wound MUST heal first.

Here are a few things to consider:

You know you’ve given your wound to God when:

  • Vengeance and payback no longer drive you
  • Shame no longer fills your heart when you think about it
  • Validating yourself is no longer on your mind
  • The desire to tell everyone who will listen no longer satisfies you so you stop
  • You feel hopeful about your future
  • Your hope is restored and you begin to dream again

Every day is a good day to hear from God. LORD, speak to my heart Journal is perfect to use every day as you ask the LORD to speak to your heart about anything that concerns you. God wants to speak.

The third tip is to Invite the LORD into that place of Hurt

So having let go of the wound and given it to God No doubt that wound or those wounds have left

holes in your soul that only LORD can truly fill.

Anything else that you’ve tried to fill it will fail in the long run

-work will not fill it

-more education will not fill it

-going shopping will not fill it

-filling your life with things will not fill it

-performing for affection will not fill it (some of you can’t say NO)

-sex can’t fill it either

You get the idea

Let’s think about this-

Maybe the wound came out of

  • lies that you believed
  • times of forced compromise
  • A sense of being used and taken advantage of
  • Feelings of rejection
  • A sense of being inadequate
  • Fear of abandonment

It doesn’t matter how the wound came- I know you hurt and you need healing

God/our Jesus will fill the areas that these wounds once filled in your soul-

  • He will fill them with truth
  • He will fill them with instructions
  • He understands, He’s been there, and He will fill those holes with love

Be reminded of what Scriptures says about our LORD Jesus Christ-the Anointed One in Isaiah 53

But He (Jesus) was wounded (meaning he was pierced through- that wound/those wounds-every experience that have pierced deep into your soul) (Jesus Christ went through that) for our transgressions (sins or rebellion even if our swound came from sin or rebellion against God’s will for us-it doesn’t matter Jesus was wounded for it),

He was bruised (sounds bearable right? Just a bruise, right? Wrong Bruised in the original language

means CRUSHED, BROKEN, SHATTERED) for our iniquities (guilt or punishment for wrong action);

The chastisement (the correction; God’s discipline) for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes

(not lines that we draw with our pens or our Sharpie markers BUT stripes that were actually blows

that cut into His flesh) we are healed.

Did you hear that?

What more do we need?

But He loves you so much He provided more-

Hear what He promises you in Psalm 147:3

He heals the broken-hearted And binds up their wounds- What a promise?

Is that you today?

Are you broken hearted and your wound needs binding up?

Know this-Jesus mends that which has been broken in pieces by firmly wrapping your wound or the pain.

He is the Great Physician

He will dress those wounds. He will ensure that the healing starts and is completed-He knows you need time to heal. He understands.

Psalm 147:5 says,

Great is our Lord and mighty in power; his understanding has no limit. (Psalm 147:5)

He understands- why?

Because of what He experienced in our place.

Ladies, Jesus is committed to your healing-He came to earth with that in mind:

When He said to our Father- not My will but Thy will be done- He had your wounds in mind

He says of Himself in Isaiah 61:1

“The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me, Because the Lord has anointed Me To preach good tidings to

the poor; He has sent Me to heal (or bind up) the brokenhearted (if you feel broken, crippled,

maimed, or wrecked) To proclaim liberty to the captives, And the opening of the prison to those who

are bound;

Many times, your wounds create a prison for your emotions that unless healing comes you will never

be free to live beyond the limit that the wound sets in your life.

Ladies, It is time to invite the God Who Heals into your wound/s if you want to walk in true freedom

and live victoriously

Jesus came to set all the captives free-included you and I

You know God is in that place of hurt and has brought healing to the wound when:

  • The memory no longer brings pain
  • The memory no longer brings shame
  • There is an undeniable sense of freedom
  • You feel secure in your identity
  • You are confident in your own skin
  • When you can forgive the one/s who wounded you or caused you pain

That’s when you know you have been healed.

You can have that. It’s within your reach. Don’t be afraid. Step into healing. You can choose to:

1. Let go of the pain that caused the wound

2. Give the pain-wound to God

3. Invite God into the hurt

God bless you.

Every day is a good day to hear from God. LORD, speak to my heart Journal is perfect to use every day as you ask the LORD to speak to your heart about anything that concerns you. God wants to speak.


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